I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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