took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I will be naked everywhere
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
