i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
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