My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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