The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
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