i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
