i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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