i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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