Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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