I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
