I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Randomize
