I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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