So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
