I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
