I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
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You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
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I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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