need another drink. this is the easiest way
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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