Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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