He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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