oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
