doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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