Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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