Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
