Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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