Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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