Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Randomize
