Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
