I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
