Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
