I murdered the dance floor call the cops
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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