Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
