shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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