In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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