Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
