She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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