I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
