There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Farmville is her only friend.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
