It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
