God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
