i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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