i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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