I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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