I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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