can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
