If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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