kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
