Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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