Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
