I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize