I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
