If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
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I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
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Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.