Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I have so many feelings about this burrito
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
